we live
by hunukr
Summary: Anthy and Utena, after. Non-chronological. Chapter 2: Sick fic! Utena takes care of Anthy, and Anthy dreams.
1. walking in the twilight with you

The apples gleam a bright ruby red in the gentle sunlight; Anthy plucks one from a low-hanging branch and **b** _ites_. The apple juice squirts, dripping in a steady stream down her chin, and she hums in satisfaction. Next to her, Utena wrinkles her nose.

"That's disgusting," she says mildly, "You should have waited and washed it first."

Everything about her is mild tonight, even more so than usual; she's calmed down considerably since their younger years, since Ohtori and Akio, but there's always a fire in her eyes, steadily burning. Even now, her eyes are like embers. To Anthy, it speaks of their past, and what it took to overcome it; but maybe she's just being sentimental, which Utena has often accused her of being in their long years together.

It's strange, Anthy thinks, to be nostalgic for a time that never existed, for a childhood that never existed. Sometimes, it twists like a knife, especially when her friends ask her about her past; she's good at spinning yarns, of course, (a phrase that never fails to make Anthy laugh because of its double meaning, both of which are true) but Utena freezes, becomes as cold as stone. Most of their neighbors and friends learned not to ask long ago, but Old Hana down the lane is persistent. Anthy wouldn't mind, but it puts Utena on edge, and when Utena is on edge Anthy is, and when they're on edge they have nightmares. Anthy will never forget when they first adopted Kaori and Chiharu, three-year-old twins. They had had nightmares for _months_ before they got the hang of it all.

Old Hana had been a great help then, taking over whenever the two young mothers looked as if they were on the verge of collapse, and often before then, sternly but kindly ushering them to bed and promising to take good care of their children.

Anthy was indebted to her, which was why she could never truly remain angry at the old woman, despite the nightmares caused by her nosiness.

Utena coughs lightly then, startling Anthy out of her daze. "Penny for your thoughts," She says, prodding gently. Anthy smiles warmly at her wife.

"I was only thinking of Old Hana, and her helpfulness with the twins, and her nosiness," She says, taking her wife's hand in hers, swinging their arms between them as if they were young again. Utena hums thoughtfully, and then suddenly makes a strange face, as if she'd bitten a lemon.

"Isn't it strange," She says casually, "That she's only twenty years older than us?" Anthy thinks over it awhile.

"Yes, it is a little weird," she says. Then she mock scowls at Utena, who looks slightly baffled.

"Now you've made me feel old!" Anthy exclaims, and her wife laughs quietly

" _You_ feel old?" She asks, shoving her playfully. "I have _silver strands_ in my hair!"

"Oh hush, they're beautiful!" Laughs Anthy. "Anyways, at least you don't have _crow's feet_!"

Utena harrumphs quietly. "Don't call them that," she says, "They're _laughter lines_! And they're totally _gorgeous_!"

The two of them glare playfully at each other, seeing who can hold out the longest, before breaking out into giggles

"My, my," says a dry, steady voice, "Look what I've found. Two pretty, young women ridiculously in love."

Anthy freezes, surprised, a grin still on her face, but Utena is not surprised in the least.

"At least I'm not an ugly old hag like you," she replies, straight-faced and equally as dry. Anthy doubles over, wheezing with laughter

Behind them, Old Hana cackles.

"You are as fun to spar with, as usual, Utena," she says, and Anthy doesn't have to see her wife to know the cloud that passed over her face in that moment, because it passed over hers too. She straightens up immediately, and Utena settles her hand on the small of her back. It is a great comfort to them both.

Nearly as one, they shake off the past and turn to greet their friend and neighbor together. She is smiling gently at them when they turn, her gentle, happy smile belying her ridiculing words.

They greet one another politely, then break out in grins.

"So, what gives us the pleasure of having you break onto our property once again?" Anthy asks teasingly. Beside her, Utena cackles. She really has a cackle that could put Old Hana to shame.

Old Hana gestures to a basket on her arm. "I made too many dango," she says, winking over at Utena. Anthy is the one who doesn't like to accept gifts, but she sighs and lets this one slide. The twins are visiting with all of _their_ children, and they'll love the treats. It is _very_ probable that Old Hana knew that. She voices this opinion, and the old woman laughs. Utena looks almost scandalized, before she too begins to laugh. Old Hana wipes tears of laughter from her eyes.

"You are a very forward woman," she says admiringly, and both Anthy and Utena light up with pride.

"She always has been, but nobody really noticed for a while," Utena says, and then freezes. Anthy stares at her, eyes wide with shock. Utena slowly covers her mouth, as if she could take back what she said by doing so. That's a ridiculous thought, of course, but Anthy sympathizes with her. Anthy smiles and takes her hand in hers, squeezing it tightly but gently.

"Let's go back to the house," she says carefully. "The children will be clamoring to see you again, Old Hana."

Old Hana, whose eyes had sharpened with glee when Utena spoke softened now, and the three old friend chattered and bickered all the way home, and although Utena was quieter now, she soon perked up and joined in on their lively discussions, just as Anthy knew she would.


	2. a spoonful of love

When Utena awoke, it was not because the sun was streaming through the windows, as usual. Or because she could hear Anthy humming a sweet little tune as she worked, as usual. Or because the twins were crying to be fed (her job), as usual. In fact, none of these things were happening. The sun was not yet up, Anthy was neither singing nor cleaning, and the twins appeared to be asleep. No, it was the heat that woke Utena up; the abominable, abominable heat. She squirmed away from it, her eyes tightly shut, nearly toppling out of the bed before her sleepy mind connect the dots and her eyes snapped open.

"Anthy?" She murmured carefully, peering over at her wife. "Anthy, darling, are you ok?"

Anthy groaned, burrowing further under their comforter, and mumbled something unintelligible. Utena sighed worriedly and got up, tiptoeing out of their bedroom and into the twins'.

"Kaori, Chiharu," she whispered, "Time to get up."

The twins groaned in near perfect unison; it was a little scary how they did that, sometimes.

"But Moooooom," Kaori whined, cracking her eye open, "It's not even light yet!"

"Hush now," Utena scolded, frowning. "Your mother is sick. I need you to go down to Old Hana's and tell her I've sent you over for a couple of days; she'll understand if you tell her why. Now go, and dress warmly. Wear your boots, not your sandles. The grass will still be damp."

The twins grumbled but they heard the no-nonsense tone in her voice and listened. Chiharu rubbed sleepily at her eyes, and Utena ruffled her hair before padding over to the phone in the hallway. First, she called Ayumi, Anthy's assistant manager, and let her know Anthy would not be coming into the nursery today; then she dialed her work. The girls trudged past her while she was waiting for the phone to pick. Chiharu stopped in front of her.

"Mom," she said quietly, "Why do we always have to go when mama's sick?"

Utena sighed. "This again, Chiharu? You know why." Chiharu scuffed her foot against the floor. "I know what you _say_ ," she said, "But I can't help but feel you're lying to us." She looked up at Utena with such earnest eyes that she couldn't be mad.

"How about this: I'll talk to your mother and if she's ok with it, we'll have a talk in a couple of days. Ok?"

Chiharu nodded happily, before scampering after her sister. Utena shook her head fondly and returned her attention to the phone, just in time.

"Utena's Law Offices for Battered Women and Children, what can I do for you?" Said the voice of a tired intern; Haruhi, if Utena was not mistaken. She stifled a laugh. "This is Utena," she said, expertly keeping her smile out of her voice. "You did very well, Haruhi, but aren't you supposed be researching?"

"Mrs. Himemiya!" Haruhi exclaimed, sounding very flustered indeed. Utena bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing aloud. "I am! I am doing my work, but Machiko needed me to cover for her because, er **—"  
**

"She's meeting up with her girl?" Utena interrupted gently. She could practically hear Haruhi deflate.

"Yes," she said quietly, "But please don't fire her! She's really good at her job, and very smart! She's just a little..."

"Flighty?" Utena supplied kindly. "Yes, I know. I won't fire her, but I will have to talk to her. Now, I won't be coming in today, so I need you to alert Chitose, alright?"

"Oh!" Haruhi exclaimed, a hint of worry tinging her voice. "Is everything ok?"

Utena let herself laugh softly at that.

"If anything was terribly wrong would I have stood talking to you for this long?" Haruhi murmured a small, embarrassed "no," and Utena smiled. The girl had a good head on her, but she was young, and at times overly emotionally invested; not always a bad trait, but it sometimes got in the way. She would learn though, Utena had great faith in her. She was the most promising of her interns.

"Everything is fine, thank you for your concern," she said, "My wife is ill; nothing serious, but I need to stay home to take care of her."

The girl on the other side of the phone let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank goodness. You're such a loving wife, Ms. Utena!" At that, Utena really did laugh.

"Thank you, Haruhi," she chuckled. _She deserves it. She deserves everything._ Her thoughts turned back to her wife, in their room, and she smiled, her heart beating a little faster, even after all of those years.

She cleared her throat.

"Well, thank you for this little chat, but I have to go now," She said, and once Haruhi said her goodbyes she hung up. She tiptoed back to her wife. She stood over her, leaning low, her hair brushing against Anthy's face. She laid her hand on Anthy's forehead before yanking it back, frowning. Anthy was _really_ burning up. She stooped lower to place a kiss on Anthy's forehead, who scrunched up her nose and grumbled.

"You woke me up," she groused, yawning. "Uuuuugh, I feel awful."

Utena hmmed softly, leaning down to kiss her brow once again.

"I'm sorry love," she said quietly. "Is there anything you need?"

Anthy seemed to doze, before startling into wakefulness again, with a soft, discomfited noise. Utena frowned. Were the nightmares starting _already_?

"Water would be nice," Anthy croaked, seemingly unaware of Utena's worried frown. Utena tried to smile for her.

"Of course," she said.

When she came back from her trek to the kitchen, water in hand, Anthy was fast asleep. She was drooling a little, which would have made Utena laugh, but she was frowning unhappily in her sleep. Her hands were clutching at the blanket tightly, and the way she was moving—choppy, frantic—suggested she was in great pain.

Utena set the cup down carefully, and laid down beside her wife. She did not wrap her arms around Anthy, as she wanted to, because she knew it would frighten poor Anthy; however, she did take her hand in hers after prying it from the blankets, smoothing her palm with her thumb.

Soon, she was dead asleep.

* * *

When Anthy woke up it felt as if fire was racing up and down her spine and her stomach was tied up in knots, twisting violently. And someone's hand was in her own, grasping it tightly, almost painfully tight.

 _Utena_.

Anthy sighed almost happily; with Utena by her side, it was much easier to put away the nightmares she'd been having. Unfortunately, she was still sick. She felt her stomach twist and squirm, and she suddenly she realized was going to happen. "Utena!" She hissed, clutching at her stomach, her eyes squeezed shut in pain.

" _Utena!_ "

Utena's eyes slid open, but it was too late. Utena watched in abject horror as her wife convulsed painfully before vomiting all over the nice clean bedclothes.

"Oh no," Anthy moaned, heaving. "I just washed these!"

Utena stood carefully, and went over to rub Anthy's back gently.

"There, there," she crooned, "Get it all out." Anthy glared balefully at her as she convulsed once again.

"I don't _want_ to," she said through gritted teeth, "At least, not on my newly washed bedclothes!"

Utena laughed, which earned her another glare.

"Don't worry about them, I'll wash them," she chuckled.

"Now, come, let's get you to the bath."

She led a trembling Anthy to the bath, which was big enough for two, and helped her to lay in it.

"There you go," she said, turning the water to scalding hot, as Anthy preferred it.

She pressed a kiss to Anthy's forehead before she left.

"Don't fall asleep," she warned, smiling softly at Anthy's answering grumble.

* * *

Despite Utena's warning, Anthy did fall asleep. The water was so hot, and it soothed the aching in her bones.

As she drifted, she dreamt of the beach; it was not like any beach she had ever been to before, and she had been to many. The sand gleamed a rosy pink in the sunlight, which was warm and gentle. The waves fell gladly upon the shore, and they made a hushed sound, unlike the roar of the oceans Anthy had passed and crossed on her search for Utena. Without a second thought, Anthy ran down to the water, and the waves rushed up to greet her, dancing over her toes, which Anthy realized were bare. In fact, she realized with no surprise whatsoever, her clothes had completely disappeared.

Anthy reveled in the cool water, and felt her fever bleed away with the receding of the tide.

Someone took her hand; Anthy turned, and it was Utena. Anthy moved towards her wife, intending to kiss her, but Utena's mouth opened.

"Anthy," her disembodied voice said.

"Anthy, it's time to wake up."

And so she did.

Utena was kneeling beside her, holding her hand.

"Had a good nap?" She teased gently. Anthy yawned and sat up.

"Yes, I had a very good dream." She frowned, placing her hand on her stomach.

"And now, I think I might be hungry." Utena chuckled and helped her stand, wrapping a warm, straight-from -the-dryer, robe around her. She supported her on her way to the kitchen and helped her sit down in her favorite chair.

"Soup? Tea?" Utena asked, getting out the ingredients for both.

"Both," Anthy said happily, snuggling further into her warm robe.

"As you wish," Utena said, winking over her shoulder. Anthy sighed contentedly, and drifted off into a doze. Utena would wake her when her meal was ready. Before she fully drifted off, she thought "this is a really good life, with Utena..." And with that, she was fast asleep.


End file.
